If you are an introvert entering a college campus for the first time, you may find it daunting. Often it can seem like a four-year-long social event. In reality, more intimate campuses like Pacific are a haven for you to be the best introvert you can all on your own. It’s important to know when to embrace your introverted tendencies and when to step out of your comfort zone. In this guide we’ll cover all the basics of being an introvert in college based on firsthand experiences from our students.
Navigating the roommate relationship
Arriving at a new school can be scary. Moving in with a roommate can be even scarier.
“I’ve noticed that introverts tend to focus too much on how others will view them and think that everyone else is more comfortable being social. That is not the case,” says Shea Bishop, an applied mathematics major and former resident assistant. “Almost everyone is going to be just as nervous as you are.”
Introverts are already good listeners. Ask about something in line with your roommate’s experience. Introverts often thrive in conversations by carefully listening and contributing thoughtfully when they feel ready. Following this may help you get to know someone better.
Scheduling “me time”
Interacting with your classmates can drain your social battery, but relying on your own introvert tendencies can help you recharge. Schedule some time for yourself when you’re not busy. Exchange class schedules with your roommate and figure out a time when they’re not going to be around. That way you can find some personal time to relax, listen to a podcast, read a book, study or watch your favorite show. You don’t even have to stay in your room. You can also spend that quiet time in the library, at the Lair or in a student lounge.
Your need to be alone to recharge is completely valid, and it will help you with the challenges you may face while transitioning to college life.
“I think that leaning into introverted tendencies a couple days before a big event or day where socializing is inevitable is the best time,” Shea said. “It allows you to enjoy that concert, day out with friends or big presentation without having to worry about being tired halfway through.”
Leaving your comfort zone
While your time to yourself is still precious, inching out of your comfort zone is equally important. Pacific hosts a wide variety of events you can check out and could lead to new friendships. But if you’re worried about the large crowds at Block Party, don’t worry, there plenty of student organizations and clubs that hold low-key events.
“I think a great example is participating in Greek life or social organization events with activities such as speed dating or other fast forms of ice breaking. Those brought me out of my comfort zone socially,” biology major Lana Heartfield said.
One-off events are often something you may want to save your social battery for but be sure not to stay longer than you want to. Move at your own pace; everyone is on different wavelengths.
Sometimes leaving your comfort zone can be as simple as answering questions in class! It’s important to leverage your time in class when you need some clarification. It’s likely others may have the same question and are also hesitating to speak up.
Setting boundaries
While it’s great to have extroverted friends who help you leave your comfort zone from time to time, it’s important to stay true to what you want for yourself and set some boundaries. Don’t let the FOMO (fear of missing out) be motivation to go out. It’s OK to say no to social events you would rather skip for some personal time. There will be plenty of activities throughout the year to go to.
Sometimes this may mean saying no to your friends.
“There are many times when it is not a personal reflection of the friendship,” said Lana. “If the person receiving the boundary is understanding, it should never be an issue or something to feel judged over. Even the most social people can get exhausted.”
College life at Pacific brings a new sense of independence and uncertainty, so it’s important to remember that the best version of you is the authentic you. Stay introverted! Live college life the way that makes you feel healthy and happy.